Oh! Little netsuke octopus throws his tiny tentacles up in shock at what comes next. Poor little fellow hasn't had his first octopus/woman sex yet!
I think I have already confessed my love of miniatures, and probably of sex, too. These beautifully carved netsuke are often less than 2" tall, so the skill it must take to carve them is quite impressive. And they are so fun. It would be nice to slip one into a pocket as something to finger or play with in a dull meeting. Under the table, of course, away from prying eyes. 
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